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Nigel Paolo Grageda

“Spider-Man: No Way Home” Unspools the Multiverse of Disappointment




There was an era when a Spider-Man film was a precious thing to be enthusiastic about. But that was long ago as “Spider-Man: No Way Home” cements, Marvel Studios’s 20-finity entry into its still growing cinematic universe without the Russo Brothers. Jon Watts directs the last in the trilogy of Spider-movies, retaining the light vibe with heavy stakes somehow. No more is the youthful, starry-eyed excitement over the web-slinging superhero — so the executives at Marvel Studios and Sony might have just decided to unspool nostalgia and pop it like champagne spraying over the biggest screen possible in the pandemic age. Straight from “Spider-Man: Far From Home,” Peter Parker (Tom Holland) is bewildered because of the exposure of his identity to public by Mysterio (Jake Gyllenhaal). The lad consults frost-shovelling Doctor Strange (Benedict Cumberbatch) to cast a spell and undo unfolding effects, erasing from collective memory that Peter Parker is Spider-Man. Simple. From the writer’s room, it can be imagined that screenwriters Chris McKenna and Erik Sommers could have been disheveled trying to concoct an ingredient to flare up this frustratingly unembellished plot. An idea: Strange’s spell cracks the multiverse as supervillains from previous Spider-Man movies trickle into the MCU — a convenient, if not nonchalant, way to introduce the Sinister Six.


Alfred Molina returns as Doctor Otto Octavius. He is oblivious, with a frown that carves his anger towards Peter Parker. Electro is still Jamie Foxx, but in this universe, he’s found his swag. Not anymore is he the Max from “The Amazing Spider-Man 2,” awkward and bullied. In “No Way Home,” he’s the big baddie — Foxx is immovable, a wall of air that tornadoes to announce Electro is a serious threat. Next for attendance check is Lizard (Rhys Ifans…for about 2 minutes or so it goes). For over half the runtime, the villain is CGI as murky as the sewers Doctor Strange found him in. Certainly, Marvel Studios is foaming to create comic-accurate movies, disappointingly, “No Way Home” has visual effects that’s painfully cartoonish. With Disney kingdom dollars, the CGI is subpar — no spell can cure the unbelievable un-rendered drawing on-screen who is supposedly Sandman. Thomas Hayden-Church’s anticipated comeback as the eventual sympathetic foe known as Flint Marko is saved for utter seconds-only cameo. Sadly, the MCU might be transforming into More Cameos Universe, relying on guest characters to invite fans to watch for no other reason than to be enthusiastic about where they might show up next. What’s Peter’s deal again?


Including Doctor Strange may be the salvation for “No Way Home.” Cumberbatch adds a luringly vexed texture to his character, the sorcerer’s next moves are nail-biting whilst Spider-Man is there to stop his tricks. During the Mirror Dimension sequence, the visual effects are amplified, clearly Disney put the majority of Mickey Mouse money to craft this awesome moment. Buildings upon skies and canyons multiply underneath and above while the train speeds in midair, Doctor Strange and Spider-Man duel amid portals for the magic box that will bring the supervillains back to their respective realms. Spider-Man, with his super geometry, webs up Strange through the teleport rings, making the Archimedean Spiral. Strings of silk conjoin from every angle possible to trap the magician in the Dimension. Your Friendly Neighborhood hops back to reality where viewers are later treated viewers to a career-peak performance from Willem Dafoe as Norman Osbourne. But Osbourne isn’t the character to exhibit his acting grandness. When he’s the deranged Green Goblin, Dafoe’s psycho-enchantment is acidic across the fanged grin. He is gruesomely devious, the abyss is slithering out of the actor’s distraught snickers as Spider-Man punches his face back to the universe he came from.


Because there are infinite realms to ruminate, McKenna and Sommers may have either overwritten or underwritten the script. The jokes are tragic, Ned Leeds (Jacob Batalon) is heartbreakingly diminished to an obvious comic relief, and his dialogues are not even hilarious. Zendaya, oh the very talented Zendaya, is designed into a banter-machine named Michelle Jones renamed MJ for comic accuracy or meta simulation. Lifeless, lachrymose, and now existing for Peter Parker, MJ’s purpose is crossing portals away from the villains. She’s intelligent, but she throws bread. It’s comedy, though too seriously sedate to be funny. Is “No Way Home” slapstick? Maybe not, but it’s highly dependent on cameos and supporting characters that Holland’s Spider-Man seems ineffective alone. Then what’s he being a hero for? After “No Way Home,” MJ might hopefully get her own solo show where she’s better explored and characterized, and Zendaya’s acts are smartly utilized. Ned would be funnier if he were in “Wandavision” — McKenna and Sommers’ lines for him are suited to the 50s-60s TV segments in which a laugh track would signal Ned’s supposedly hilarious moment. Marvel Studios, please include a laugh track in the next movies to notify when audiences should giggle. And…laugh


Pre-credits, Spider-Man swings in his newly-sewn glittery suit — all classic red and blue wondrousness — across New York. What’s he gonna do? Fight criminals without cameos? Where’s Matt Murdock (Charlie Cox) at? The costume reveal sequence is mandatory since “Wandavision” (2020), every superhero dons their freshest and best uniforms for photo-ops during the final seconds of their appearance. Does it incite thrill for the following episodes in the MCU? The answer relies on who and how many still watches, disappointment after Disney Plus disappointment. Although Holland tries eagerly to tear up and ache through his bleeding non-wounds (his face is flawless even beat up), he performs searingly: he has steam in his sentimentality yet drenched and snuffed by the cries for the secondary cast he’s lamenting over. Peter reaches ultimate maturity — his arc finds its center of completion from the spiral, the locus he’s webbed Strange — and his friends, including Tony Stark — into. It transpires through the upgraded significance of May (Marisa Tomei). Majorly sidelined for plot’s sake in “Far From Home,” she’s the force behind Peter’s bettered motives. With Tomei’s unsuspecting gall, she armors May to become braver that she’s thought to be; prepared to push villains to their limits of their insanity to shield Peter. Tomei provides sensibility through her sappy yet valorous appearance, enabling Holland to tap his own core and loosen towards melancholy. Superheroes need emotionality to become connective, otherwise, they’re just idols which Spider-Man has been since “Homecoming.” And he shouldn’t be. In 2019’s “Avengers: Infinity War,” Thanos grabs Spider-Man by the neck and slams him to snarl, “Insect.” Peter is pesky. An accidental hero, his personal wishes drive him to cause the problems. He will try his darnest to save those endangered by his own hands, despite dropping them on their heads. And when they’re all shards and dust, he’ll clean up to fix the perennially broken parts. Peter does that: dislillusioned heroism. He may not be a hero, but he’s responsible. Only after he’s messed up and somebody named Stark and Strange would stress over his mistakes. If this is the ‘hero’ whom Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Stark, and every other Avenger sacrificed for, then the world may be doomed to self-destruction. Hawkeye would be livid, but maybe Thanos was right. So is Jonah J. Jameson, main anchors of news program ‘TheDailyBugle.net’ J.K. Simmons is still angry, due to that perennial temper, he’s genuinely volatile amid his volcanic tirades which unusually garners Jameson as the movie’s conscience — when he announces on air that Spider-Man is dangerous to the city and its folks, it’s maliciously sincere…it’s truth.


From Strange’s “Please, Scooby-Doo this crap,” and Doc Ock’s “He’s gonna kill us all,” to Sandman’s “I don’t care, I just want to come home,” and Electro’s “It’s just a tree,” the dialogues are as corny as the supervillain’s acting are soullessly playful. When Ned declares to his best pal Peter, “I’m not gonna turn into a supervillain and try to kill you,” it’s screenwriting so plain and humor-less as if lightning could shoot and could be seen dwindling slowly — the impact already known therefore the absence of brace and shock fizzles the crispness of written awe towards nothing. Just web — agiw — as Ned’s grandma (Mary Rivera) commands to swipe off from the corner of the ceiling. Rivera spews Tagalog conversation in a cheap sales trick — even with an utter of lola, Filipino for grandmother — to lure more Filipino viewership and ticket purchases into the MCU. It’s tasteless, shameless, and dumbfounding, but if it sells, then this spell might be best for the multiverse. Great technique, questionable execution.


When Strange finally escapes and reemerges from a portal, he sighs a familiar banter, “I was dangling over the Grand Canyon for over 12 hours!” He takes the magic box from Peter, attempts to contain the multiverse in a marble-sized energy spool, however, the power of the realms breach from his grasp and rips the sky into slashes of universes. Peter, sensing responsibility, suggests a cleanup spell that could be the greatest act of valor Spider-Man has managed, because thankfully “No Way Home” could fade from existence as Strange has always wanted: a taintless, peaceful flow of galaxies. Without “No Way Home,” disappointments are forgotten. With more than a decade, about 30 films and series in its slate, Marvel Studios should have already made the most amazing Spider-Man movie. Rather, “No Way Home” has featured a dismaying variation of the revered superhero. And it might be opportune to stop the MCU here. There’s no more reason for it to continue inasmuch as the train in the Mirror Dimension ever goes. Marvel Studios is totally a Walt Disney machine, whilst a deal with Sony. It’s unheroic, despite supreme salesmanship. The magic has billowed into remembering, and when we do, it will cast expectancies and letdowns altogether. Good, feelings should stick — a web of imaginings once made true. It tingles, it affects, it’s magic anew. How? In perhaps the single funny quip in “No Way Home,” Doctor Strange spills the secret to his tricks: “Lots of birthday parties.”





Director: Jon Watts

Images & Trailer ©️ Marvel Studios, Sony Pictures Releasing; YouTube.com

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